Just to prove I don’t just have it in for DC Comics, I got two gripes for Marvel.

Part 1: Dark Tower

Marvel keeps publishing these guides to the world of the Dark Tower comics based on the famous series by Stephen King. There’s nothing wrong with that, in fact I love reading everything I can get when it comes to “The Dark Tower,” but shouldn’t these books have at least a page or two of comics in them? DC always breaks up the monotony of page after page of profile with a 4-page story in their Secret Files books, but the guys at Marvel just print these $4 encyclopedias. Is there any good reason, aside from the pretty pictures, that I wouldn’t just go out and buy the Dark Tower Concordance?

2. Dark Reign: Elektra and Dark Reign: Hawkeye

Just from a story standpoint, is there any reason that these two limited series can’t just be the same book? Times is hard out there, economically, so why bombard fans with superfluous comics? As near as I can tell, the Hawkeye book is just Bullseye wearing Hawkeye’s costume and resorting to meaningless violence in spite of Norman Osborn’s complaints. The Elektra book at least catches us up on the character of Elektra, who was kidnapped sometime before the Skrull invasion, and has Bullseye/Hawkeye chasing her down for what promises to be some meaningless, yet exciting violence.

Bullseye works well as a Daredevil villain and even as a Deadpool supporting character, but between Dark Avengers, Hawkeye, Elektra and any guest appearances he’ll be making as the Dark Avengers do battle with other Marvel heroes, I think we’ll be seeing enough of him. If Marvel keeps over-exposing Bullseye, I suspect fans are going to get tired of seeing him.

I came across this article titled “10 Things Cable Companies Won’t Say.” I’m a big advocate of people understanding the politics of telecommunications, especially since I at one time ran a cable channel (into the ground). Most of the article they get right, for example deregulation is almost always a bad idea, and has been for cable. It is also important to note that their multi-service package deals are usually a scam, and if they have a special offer, chances are it will expire 3-6 months into your service.

A couple of things in the article, however, are worth arguing against. For one thing, as long as the government keeps pushing back the digital switch, there is no reason to criticize cable companies for not offering “a la carte” selection. For one thing, if you think cable is expensive now, wait until a growing number of 20-something males can opt to only subscribe to Comedy Central, Cartoon Network and ESPN. You’ll be paying through the nose for the luxury of watching HGTV and the Food Network. For another thing, you know they’re just going to make the a la carte choices so expensive that the packages will be a steal by comparison. Have you ever done the math on a value meal at McDonald’s? They’re giving those fries away!

Also, as long as the demand for bandwidth keeps rising, don’t complain about fiber-optic cable being unsightly. You don’t get to have your cake and eat it too. We can live in an increasingly digital world or you can give up your undisclosed eBay income.

For me, the choice between cable and satellite is a no-brainer. The options available in on-demand more than make up for the fact that Comcast or Time-Warner is putting all my viewing habits into the Skynet database which will ultimately enslave humanity, but we should demand as much courtesy from our cable companies as we do our other home services. They should improve customer service and create additional HD programming, but they won’t do it unless they have competition, which is why satellite television is still a viable choice.

There’s no easy answers in this home-entertainment mess, but the only way to find them is to educate yourself. In the meantime it may be a good idea to go out and see a movie.

I had the pleasure of meeting J. F. Lewis last year at DragonCon, where he was hoping to promote his recently released novel, “Staked.” Dekker and I were interviewing him for an AMC show which may or may not have ever aired, but J. F. gained one fan as I listened to him describing the plot of his novel, which centers around a vampire named Eric and his stripper girlfriend, Tabitha, who just won’t stop begging Eric to turn her into a vampire. Eric lives in a town called Void City, a place infested with werewolves, demons, witches and, of course, vampires. The vampires basically run the city, which we learn is based somewhere in the south-eastern United States, while most of the humans wander around completely oblivious to their handlers.

A note to anti-spoiler nuts: the following is all revealed in the product description for “Revamped.” If you don’t want to skip ahead, check out “Staked” first.

*Begin Spoilers*

Eric turns Tabitha early in “Staked,” so the narrative splits as the reader jumps back and forth between Eric and Tabitha’s perspectives as Eric battles a local werewolf clan and Tabitha adjusts to life as a vampire. Tabitha quickly becomes involved with the local blood-sucker high society while Eric learns about his origins and gets involved with Tabitha’s sister, Rachel, who happens to be a tantric witch. “Staked” ends with Eric being betrayed by his best friend and turned into a kind of ghost after having his body atomized.

*End Spoilers*

“Revamped” picks up right where the last novel ended, so you’ll probably be lost if you decide to read the books out of order. People who read the first novel and were disappointed by the cliffhanger ending will no doubt be satisfied as Lewis wraps up this story while hinting at things to come. In a culture dominated by feminized vampire tales like “Buffy,” “Twilight,” and the Anita Blake series (all of which I like, btw), it’s fun to have a vampire hero who acts before he thinks and rarely broods.

What makes Lewis’ take on vampire mythology so interesting is the powers and weaknesses with which he imbues the various monsters who rule “The Void.” In addition to the traditional vampire and werewolf characters, we also get to see revnants, ghosts, mages, and even a sort of holy werecat named Talbot. The vampires’ abilities vary from person to person, so much so that there are actually 5 classes of vampire described in the novels, the lowest being drones and the highest being the emperor class, each with their own unique abilities.

Look, I could comb through the book and hack away at the diction and sentence structure and differences in character voice, but these books are fun. If you’re looking for some easy-to-read fantasy action, or an adult counterpoint to our Twilight-dominated popular culture, then the combination of “Staked” and “Revamped” will definitely satisfy.